I would like to share with you all some sayings I found...gasp...on the internet. these quotes are superb. they will make you smile. and if they don't...well, they'll make you waste 2 and a half minutes staring at the computer. but hey. life is short.
(just for your information, I can't vouch for any of the people who said these things...they're just random quotes, people, don't give me a hard time for it.)
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"Remember: Don't Insult the Alligator till after you cross the river." -Unknown
"Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh man....I could be eating a slow learner." - Lyndon B. Johnson.
"When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car." - Unknown.
"I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals." - Winston Churchill.
"42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot." - Unknown
"I do not like broccoli. And I haven't liked it since I was a little kid and my mother made me eat it. And I'm President of the United States and I'm not going to eat any more broccoli." - George Bush.
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that was amazing. yay for me. clapity clap clap.
goodbye and have a nice life.
Monday, May 25, 2009
Thursday, May 21, 2009
the truth...
about my brother. well. many people don't actually know this. but. he's an ogre. yup. you'd better believe it.
you don't want to meet him in a dark alley. or anywhere else for that matter.
what truths have you been withholding from the general populace? leave them in the comments section and rach and i will decide on the best. and there probably won't be a prize. but you can feed Toby. try it. it's fun.
you don't want to meet him in a dark alley. or anywhere else for that matter.
what truths have you been withholding from the general populace? leave them in the comments section and rach and i will decide on the best. and there probably won't be a prize. but you can feed Toby. try it. it's fun.
Monday, May 18, 2009
part 18 {lib}
The Zangler's house appeared to be asleep as Eliana crossed the street. She was about to knock on the door when she heard a loud thumping coming from the other side. Curiously, she opened the door, sticking her head around the corner. She could only bite her lip in an effort to keep from laughing at the sight that met her eyes. A very frustrated Addison was scrambling over a couch with a colander in one hand and a fly swatter in the other.
"He's loose!" Addison panted, without turning around. He fell off the back of the couch. "The lemur! Help me catch him!"
Eliana saw a flash of white fur as Addison ran into the kitchen. She followed him, but couldn't help laughing out loud when she saw the little furry ball perched on top of the refrigerator, surveying Addison with disdain.
"Distract him," Addison whispered.
"Um, ok. What's his name?" Eliana whispered back.
"Gregory."
"Gregory?" Eliana exclaimed.
The lemur turned to look at her, and Addison sprang forward, slamming the colander down on top of the fridge. "Perfect!" He grinned. "Thanks. I've been chasing him since 6:30."
"Sure," Eliana answered. The lemur was banging it's head repeatedly against the colander, which Addison was holding down.
"Hand me the kennel, will you?" He gestured with his head toward a tangerine plastic pet carrier on the table. Eliana brought it over and Addison reached under he colander to grab the angry lemur. "Ah!" he shrieked as Gregory bit him. Together, they wrestled the struggling animal into the cage, slamming the door shut and latching it.
"Whew! what a work-out," Addison said, collapsing onto the couch a moment later.
"Where's Hayden?" Eliana wondered.
"Still asleep."
"Yeah, I would be too if I was calling people at two in the morning," Eliana answered ruefully.
"I got up early," Addison said. "I couldn't wait to see Gregory. Unfortunately, he escaped pretty quickly."
The two rested for a moment, and the phone suddenly rang.
"I've got it," Eliana said, picking it up. "Zangler residence, how can I help you?"
"Ah, very good," a boy's voice said. "I would like a pickle and butter sandwich on rye, some strawberry jello, and a quart of wasabi chick-peas sent up to my room. Also, please make sure Gregory has his raisins, and a shot of rum."
Eliana was speechless. Was this guy for real?
-----
Yes, we're still here! Bear with me as I get back into the swing of this remarkable work. As Ernestine Ulmer so brilliantly stated, "Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first." The truth will set you free.
Cheers.
p.s. The hamster's name is Toby.
"He's loose!" Addison panted, without turning around. He fell off the back of the couch. "The lemur! Help me catch him!"
Eliana saw a flash of white fur as Addison ran into the kitchen. She followed him, but couldn't help laughing out loud when she saw the little furry ball perched on top of the refrigerator, surveying Addison with disdain.
"Distract him," Addison whispered.
"Um, ok. What's his name?" Eliana whispered back.
"Gregory."
"Gregory?" Eliana exclaimed.
The lemur turned to look at her, and Addison sprang forward, slamming the colander down on top of the fridge. "Perfect!" He grinned. "Thanks. I've been chasing him since 6:30."
"Sure," Eliana answered. The lemur was banging it's head repeatedly against the colander, which Addison was holding down.
"Hand me the kennel, will you?" He gestured with his head toward a tangerine plastic pet carrier on the table. Eliana brought it over and Addison reached under he colander to grab the angry lemur. "Ah!" he shrieked as Gregory bit him. Together, they wrestled the struggling animal into the cage, slamming the door shut and latching it.
"Whew! what a work-out," Addison said, collapsing onto the couch a moment later.
"Where's Hayden?" Eliana wondered.
"Still asleep."
"Yeah, I would be too if I was calling people at two in the morning," Eliana answered ruefully.
"I got up early," Addison said. "I couldn't wait to see Gregory. Unfortunately, he escaped pretty quickly."
The two rested for a moment, and the phone suddenly rang.
"I've got it," Eliana said, picking it up. "Zangler residence, how can I help you?"
"Ah, very good," a boy's voice said. "I would like a pickle and butter sandwich on rye, some strawberry jello, and a quart of wasabi chick-peas sent up to my room. Also, please make sure Gregory has his raisins, and a shot of rum."
Eliana was speechless. Was this guy for real?
-----
Yes, we're still here! Bear with me as I get back into the swing of this remarkable work. As Ernestine Ulmer so brilliantly stated, "Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first." The truth will set you free.
Cheers.
p.s. The hamster's name is Toby.
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